Ongoing Advice To My Cat

"Mummy's" suitcase is not a cat bed.

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

The touch sensitive talking alarm clock/thermometer in the spare bedroom is for human use, not for pussycat use at 4:00AM!

Professionals

There are good, efficient, knowledgeable professionals and incompetent, useless "professionals".

Choose your "professional" wisely!

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

I really shouldn't have to lift you to your food bowl in order to tempt you to eat, you do have legs and can perfectly well walk to it!

The Benefits of Wall Staring

I commend that psychological benefits of wall staring.

A Pox Upon Microsoft Downloads

My thanks to Microsoft for downloading a "service pack" into my pc yesterday that took 30 minutes for my pc to configure, before it would allow me to use it; and then slowing the pc down for another hour whilst other downloads were assimilated.

Advice To Dishonest Businessmen

In the short term your scams, con tricks and dishonesty may well give you some short term gains. However, in the long term these lies and scams will avail you of nothing; you will end up penniless and friendless.

A Wise Owl

A wise owl said to me yesterday:

"Being ashamed is far better than being shameful".

He is a wise owl indeed!

Advice To Apprentice Candidates

To experience true "blue sky thinking", open a window and throw yourselves out of it.

The Danger of Sandals

Sandals are unsatisfactory footwear, they signify undisciplined thinking and louche behaviour.

Advice To Apprentice Candidates

Try sprinkling less cocaine on your cornflakes in the morning; that way you will have a more balanced and realistic perception of yourselves, your skills, your personalities and how you interact with others around you.

Worried? - Don't Be!

Sunshine

Sunshine over the bank holiday weekend, who would have thought it?

Advice To Mr Muscle

Put your drain unblocking product into a bottle that can actually be opened by a human being!

Sunshine

Sunshine again?

Could it be that we are finally seeing the stirrings of summer?

It's Sausage Time!

Great Lies of The 21st Century

"We value our customers and have listened to their opinions."

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Please do not sleep on the TV remote control when I am trying to watch TV.

What If?

"What ifs?" are the opiate of those who lack the vision, imagination and courage to chart a new course for their lives.

Advice To Hotmail Regarding Outlook

It would be really nice if you could sort out the gremlins in your new "improved" Outlook, so that I don't have to keep seeing this message on my account:

"We can't connect to Outlook at the moment. Please try again later"