In order to stand a fighting chance of getting the fridge/freezer into your house and into the room of your choice, unbox it and take the doors off it first!
Friday, July 31, 2020
Thursday, July 30, 2020
Ken's Helpful Hints - Purchasing Large Products
When purchasing large products, such as furniture or major appliances, always make sure that not only does the product fit in the place it is destined for but that it will also fit through the door and up/down the stairs etc.
Wednesday, July 29, 2020
Tuesday, July 28, 2020
The Plague In Spain
The plague in Spain has proven to be a pain (for some)
Again
The plague in Spain has proven to be a pain
By George I think they've got it!
An what has caused this pain?
The plague! The plague!
And where is this sodding plague?
In Spain! In Spain!
Ole!
Monday, July 27, 2020
Monday Morning
A grey and wet July Monday morning is warmly greeted by the central heating switching itself on!
Friday, July 24, 2020
The Secret of My Vitality
People often ask me what is the secret of my vitality?
Simple:
-Drink vodka and sambuca
-Drink 4 litres of water a day
-Have a spoonful of kimchi for breakfast
-Have cold showers
-Walk
-Eat meat with a good layer of fat
Simples!
Thursday, July 23, 2020
Advice To Myself
Don't accept gifts of spicy chicken in a bright red sauce from Eva's plate, when wearing white trousers!
#SauceGate
Wednesday, July 22, 2020
Advice To The Guardian and Other Idiots
MI5 and other agencies aren't your personal private detectives that will snap to at your beck and call, to investigate every half arsed conspiracy theory that you make up!
Tuesday, July 21, 2020
Fact!
Russia doesn't give a fuck about its reputation, nor its future.
It takes pleasure in spitting at its neighbours, and being as disagreeable as possible.
Monday, July 20, 2020
The Elephant in The Room
When discussing the elephant in the room, please remember to be polite.
Elephants are sensitive creatures, and he/she may be very hurt if you say unkind things about him/her.
Friday, July 17, 2020
Farewell Jumbo!
British Airways, the world’s largest operator of Boeing 747, retires entire fleet of jumbo jets with immediate effect https://t.co/fU1Ioy2pnv pic.twitter.com/wi70LWlQck
— Reuters (@Reuters) July 17, 2020
The halcyon days of flying!
Thursday, July 16, 2020
Twitter Hacked
Beware Bitcoin offers from Twitter "blue ticks", they have been hacked and the hacker is trying to scam you!
Don't fall prey to your own greed and stupidity!
Wednesday, July 15, 2020
Question For The Bristol Police
What are you going to do if someone pulls down the replacement statue?
Tuesday, July 14, 2020
Monday, July 13, 2020
Flying vs Falling
Flying and falling may, for a period of time, feel the same.
However, as you approach the ground you will soon realise that they are not the same!
Friday, July 10, 2020
My Sympathies To Robert De Niro!
Robert De Niro 'will be lucky if he makes $7.5 million this year', lawyers say https://t.co/PWVtFOtI5p
— The Independent (@Independent) July 10, 2020
Hence the old adage:
You can never have enough money, because the more you have the more you WANT!
Thursday, July 09, 2020
Wednesday, July 08, 2020
Advice To Brighton Council - Madeira Drive is a Destination, Not a Thoroughfare!
Madeira Drive is a destination, not a thoroughfare.
Closing it permanently will strangle what little hope there is of a financial recovery this year for the seafront traders and tourism industry, thus depriving you of tax revenue!
Like it or not, Brighton needs tourists; if you cut back on the amenities, and make them feel unwelcome, they will go elsewhere.
Tuesday, July 07, 2020
Advice To Prince Harry
1 Membership of the Commonwealth is voluntary.
2 Not all members of the Commonwealth were part of the Empire.
3 Your grandmother is head of the Commonwealth.
Monday, July 06, 2020
Alfresco
Alfresco wining and dining in the UK rarely comes up to expectations, thanks to our gloriously unreliable weather!
Friday, July 03, 2020
Bouncing Balls
The higher they bounce, the further they have to fall.
Thus it is the same for humans!
Thursday, July 02, 2020
Wednesday, July 01, 2020
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