I have thought long and hard about how to tackle the current epidemic of drunken yobbery, seen in many of our city centres each weekend.
I have now come up with the solution, which I ask to be implemented without delay.
Those convicted of drunken antisocial behaviour should have their foreheads stamped with an indelible ink message, for a period of time to be determined by the courts.
The message would read:
"I am a drunken yob"
Those people with this sign on their foreheads would be refused admission to pubs and clubs. Those pubs and clubs that were found to be allowing them access, would have their licences revoked.
At the end of the punishment period, the sign would be removed.
Simple, cheap but 100% effective!