Ken's Blue Blog
Musings on "the bleedin' obvious"; views on the meaning of life, or anything else that takes my fancy.

Friday, July 30, 2010

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Moths do not speak "cat", therefore it is a waste of time meowing to them.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

I am pleased that you have heeded my advice re the ironing board not being a threat, and that you now seem to be less afraid of it.

However, maybe you could refrain from using it as a springboard from which to jump onto my stomach when I am reclining near by?

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

The ironing board is not a predator, nor does it present a clear and present danger to your safety.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010


Blockades lead to war, be very certain that is what you want when you apply them.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Friday, July 23, 2010

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Dead moths in your mouth are not really suitable for parading with pride in our kitchen.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Living In The Past

Those who wallow in past battles and wars (either in self pity or self congratulations) are condemned never to move forward into the future.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Advice To The US Senate

The Scottish legal system is autonomous from the English one.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Advice To Restaurants

Where you have an online resevration system on your website, for fark's sake use one that actually works!

Monday, July 19, 2010

Friday, July 16, 2010


There is ALWAYS such a thing as coincidence!

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

The wind rustling the curtains does not, under normal circumstances, constitute a threat to your safety.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Advice To Sky Call Centre

Given that we have told you that MrX does not live at our address, and that we do not have (nor ever had) a Sky account, kindly stop ringing us and delete our phone number from your records.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

When "presenting" fur balls please could you use your tray, or even the garden, rather than our newly cleaned Chinese rug?

Monday, July 12, 2010

Friday, July 09, 2010

Advice To Self

When "cutting and pasting" it is advisable to complete both parts of the operation before going on to "cut" again.

Thursday, July 08, 2010

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Bringing your friends over is very nice, but do you all have to run up and down all the stairs of our house at 4am?

Wednesday, July 07, 2010


Funerals would be much easier to organise without the input of family and priests.

Tuesday, July 06, 2010

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Please wipe your paws after trying to climb the chimneys of our fireplaces.

Monday, July 05, 2010

Friday, July 02, 2010

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Potato salad (with chives and spring onions) is really not to your taste, honest!

Thursday, July 01, 2010


When acting in haste to "prove" your standpoint, always make sure that your "facts" match reality.