Ken's Blue Blog
Musings on "the bleedin' obvious"; views on the meaning of life, or anything else that takes my fancy.

Friday, November 28, 2014

Advice To Consumers

Don't fight over products in stores, not only is it undignified it is pointless; the product's "novelty" will soon wear off, and the void that the product temporarily filled will return with a vengeance!

Thursday, November 27, 2014

Wednesday, November 26, 2014


Evil can never face itself. Hence, in order to destroy it you must confront it with itself.

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Temporal Paradoxes

Temporal paradoxes are resolved by the creation and addition of a new time-stream to those already in existence. Hence time travel is perfectly possible.

Monday, November 24, 2014

Log Fires

When tending a particularly sooty log fire, it is always advisable to scrub your nails thoroughly before going to bed.

Friday, November 21, 2014

Cat Alarm Clocks

Cats are very reliable alarm clocks. Unfortunately they are programmed to wake you at 5am.

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Staring at my intently from the windowsill, in the early hours, won't get me out of bed any faster in the mornings to feed you.

Monday, November 17, 2014

Firmly Grounded

The more firmly you are grounded, the greater the heights you can aspire to fly to.

Friday, November 14, 2014

Flat Roofs

Given the predominance of rain in the UK, it is very bold of some people to design and build flat roofed homes.

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Advice To Manufacturers of Prepacked Sliced Chicken Breast

Pressing the wafer thin slices of reformed chicken slurry so tightly together in the pack makes it impossible to separate them.

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Please don't dribble into my ear when I am sleeping.

Monday, November 10, 2014

Thor's Hammer

Thor is continuing to strike his hammer against his anvil, this despite it being November.

Have we displeased him in some way?

Friday, November 07, 2014

Advice To Spiders

Get out of my bathroom, or I will send the cat in after you!

Thursday, November 06, 2014


When positioning a Roman Candle, or an equivalent star shooting pyrotechnic, it is advisable to ensure that the location is not overhung by a tree!

Wednesday, November 05, 2014

Tuesday, November 04, 2014

Halloween Pumpkins

It is inadvisable to use more than one candle in a Halloween pumpkin, lest the pumpkin catches fire from the excess heat.

Monday, November 03, 2014

Test of Character

It is a true test of someone's character to get up on a wet, windy, grey, cheerless November Monday morning!