Title

Ken's Blue Blog
Musings on "the bleedin' obvious"; views on the meaning of life, or anything else that takes my fancy.

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Bank Holiday Weather

As the UK gears itself up for a 4 day bank holiday weekend, to celebrate the Diamond Jubilee and /or hold a BBQ or street party, it is of course guaranteed that the recent spell of sunshine is coming to an end and the temperature falling!

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Converts

Converts are the loudest and most fanatical members of a group, political party or religion.

Monday, May 28, 2012

Ongoing Advice To My Cat



The front door is for humans, the cat flap in the door into the garden is for cats.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Air Conditioning

Air conditioning is the devil's invention, it spreads disease and infection faster than a plague ridden rat.

A pox upon air conditioning!

Free yourselves, turn it off and open a window instead!

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Sunshine

The sun has finally returned to the UK, marking the start of Pimm's season.

Huzzah!

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Question For My Cat



Why, when you know that you are just about to spew forth a furball do you insist on coming in from the garden into the kitchen to spew it forth onto the kitchen floor when I am preparing food?

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Advice To Sauna Users

Metal is a very effective conductor of heat. Therefore don't be surprised that you burn yourself if you are foolish enough to wear jewellery, or carry keys into the sauna!

Monday, May 21, 2012

Ongoing Advice To My Cat



The freshly cooked pieces of gammon placed on your plate were for you to eat, the gammon joint placed on the carving board was not for you to eat!

Friday, May 18, 2012

Ongoing Advice To My Cat



The ironing board, unlike the vacuum cleaner, is not a threat to your health, safety or restful sleep; therefore there is no need to run away whenever it appears.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Question For My Cat



Why don't you enjoy the vacuum cleaner like the cat above?

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Sunshine

Do my eyes deceive me, is that the sun shining?

Surely not!

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Ongoing Advice To My Cat



Your bowls are for your food, please do not drag your food out of them onto the floor to eat it.

Monday, May 14, 2012

The Cycle of Life

Last week on the beachfront I was mistaken for some lesser known actor by a hen party, who had their photos taken with me. This week, on the same beachfront, a couple of blokes took exception to my white jacket and trousers and shouted:
"What a cunt!"
Life places you upon a mountain top one day, then throws you into the valley the next!

C'est la vie!

Wednesday, May 09, 2012

Happy Europe Day - Pass The Sick Bag!

Today, apparently, is "Europe Day".

Pass the sick bag someone!

Tuesday, May 08, 2012

Bank Holidays

Why are bank holidays always so wet and dismal?

Friday, May 04, 2012

Advice To Spammers

Starting your spam with the phrase "This is not spam" simply doesn't cut the mustard!

Thursday, May 03, 2012

A Pox Upon This Drought!

A pox upon this accursed drought, during which the rain never ends!

Wednesday, May 02, 2012

Gravy and Mobile Phones

It is unwise to spill gravy onto a touch screen mobile phone.

Tuesday, May 01, 2012

Cat Matters



Pussycat pussycat, what big paws you have!