Advice To Theresa May

Calling EU citizens who are legitimately residing and working in the UK "queue jumpers" was not your "finest hour"!

Advice To Interpol

Got a bit lost in the fog of Brexit war but this is causing palpitations in certain bits of Whitehall
https://t.co/nd6Skl1SDB

— Francis Elliott (@elliotttimes) November 19, 2018

Don't put a Russian in charge!

Happy Beaujolais Nouveau Day!

Happy Beaujolais Nouveau Day everyone.

I, for one, will be downing a few bottles tonight!

Advice To The Prime Minister

Wasting two years on negotiating a "deal" that no one supports is not statesmanship.

Advice To Baraboo High School

Shut down your school and hang your heads in shame!

Monday Advice

Those of you who can't seem to function on Mondays should consider starting your weekend on Thursday and beginning the new week on Sunday; that way you will be bright eyed, bushy tailed and actually turn up to work on Monday!

Today I am Mainly Being...

Today I am mainly being:

A Great Moral Leader!

Advice To HP

Change your "captcha" picture verification process for your printer set up.

I spent over twenty minutes this morning being forced to click never ending pictures of traffic lights, cars, buses and cycles before your Pro 6970 printer graciously allowed me to finalise the set up and use it!

Hobnobbing

Hobbing is fine, but I draw the line at nobbing!

Water

Water is cunning and patient, it will always find a way to get in to where it's not wanted!

Happy Guy Fawkes Night

Remember, remember... to buy the latest Private Eye. Or ensure you never miss a copy (and save £22 on the cover price each year) by subscribing: https://t.co/nHifXIPCO4 pic.twitter.com/jCwUm3XvaZ

— Private Eye Magazine (@PrivateEyeNews) November 5, 2018

Advice To Personal Trainers

You should be less fat and more fit than the person you are training.