Poem For The Rat That Crosses My Path Every Morning Along The Seafront

 

Good morning Mr Rat,

Where are you at?

Lucky for you,

I didn't bring my cat!

The End

The Sunday Sport Nails It!

 

25 years I've been here and in that time I've written millions of words of pointless tripe. Even in another 25 years, though, I'll never reach this standard... pic.twitter.com/c3wi24OCBI

— Sunday Sport (@thesundaysport) August 30, 2022

Have It Large This Bank Holiday Weekend!

 

Risk

 

A ship in a harbour is exposed to less risk than when it is at sea. However, that is not why ships are built!

Every Success To The People of Ukraine on Their Independence Day

 

Prepping For The Winter Energy Crisis

 

Remember to have plentiful stocks of tinned food that can be eaten without being heated up, and remember to have a tin opener in case the pull ring/can key breaks!

Graft is Good!

 

Weather App - 100% More Reliable Than The TV Forecasts

 

Save Money on Postage

 

How to save money on postage:

1 Address the letter to yourself.

2 Write the recipient's address on the back.

3 Do NOT put a stamp on it.

4 Post it.

The Royal Mail will then send it to the addressee on the back, saying insufficient postage!

Have it Large This Weekend!

 

Kudos To The Labour Party

 

Kudos to the Labour party, they have held a secret leadership election and voted in Gordon Brown as their new leader in less than a week.

Something the Tories could learn from!

I've Cornered The Hosepipe Market

 

Ofgem's Energy Price Cap

 It's BOLLOCKS!

Advice To Ballet Companies

 

Hire taller dancers, so that they don't have to stand on their tippy toes!

Energy Cost Saving Tip

 

Boil as much water as you can during the period before the price of energy goes up again, then freeze it and use it when energy prices have risen.

Well Done Nancy!

 

FIVE MISSILES FIRED BY CHINA LANDED WITHIN JAPAN'S EXCLUSIVE ECONOMIC ZONE: KYODO CITING JAPAN FOREIGN MINISTRY OFFICIAL

— First Squawk (@FirstSquawk) August 4, 2022

IRONY KLAXON - Blue Horseshoe Loves TSMC

 

US HOUSE SPEAKER NANCY PELOSI WILL MEET WITH THE CHAIRMAN OF TAIWAN SEMICONDUCTOR MANUFACTURING COMPANY (TSMC), MARK LIU - WAPO

— First Squawk (@FirstSquawk) August 2, 2022

Is it not "ironic" that Pelosi's husband has traded large volumes of chip shares recently?

Advice To Nancy Pelosi

 Go home!

August Already - It'll Soon Be Christmas