Small Pots

Small pots can have big ears!

The Channel Tunnel

Shut the farking tunnel until the French have regained control of Calais!

The Channel Tunnel

Until the chaos on the French side of the Channel Tunnel in Calais is sorted out, it should be closed and losses incurred by British business be billed to the French authorities!

Vacuum Cleaners

The noisiest vacuum cleaners are not always the suckiest!

Courage

Courage is something that you don't know you have until you are tested. Then you can never be sure that you will have it in the future, when you are tested again.

The Failure of WiFi

WiFi has failed to meet expectations, a service that repeatedly drops connection because of atmospherics and interference from other networks is fark all use to man and beast!

Bowels

Always keep your bowels well hydrated!

How To Look Good In Photos

- Stomach in

- Chest out

- Don't slouch 

- Remove any extraneous cabbage leaves from your teeth!

Jonahs

Never have a Jonah on a ship, aircraft or in a small business.

Advice To My Computer

You are here for my benefit, not yours.

Hotmail

A pox upon Hotmail's slowness and clunkiness!

Thinking vs Knowing

Thinking you know something is not the same thing as knowing something for sure.

Advice To The Greeks

Get out of the Eurozone for your own good!

The British Summer

Summer 2015 appears to be turning into a damp squib (although I would say "squid" seems more appropriate!).

Bananas

Set yourself up for the day ahead with a banana.

Networking

Get the most out of networking events, by having a few stiff vodkas beforehand!

The British Summer

The British summer is temporarily in abeyance.

Please stand by!

Advice To Juncker

Don't send SMS's (especially to Tsipras) when you are drunk!

Belief

Believing something is not the same as knowing something!

Facebook and IE

I suggest that the technical departments of Facebook and IE liaise with each other, because there is an issue wrt posting comments on FB when using IE.

In the meantime switching to Chrome resolves the issues!

Populism and Democracy

Populism is not the same as democracy and, more often than not, erodes democracy.

Hot Weather

During hot weather always ensure that you have sufficient vodka to hand.