Suppliers

The phrase "the customer is king" is only half of the story. Suppliers need to be treated with care and attention as well, piss them off and you will screw your business up.

Astrology

Utter bollocks!

Advice To Voters

Don't vote for politicians with religious beliefs.

Advice To Prime Ministers

Prime Ministers who have never seen military service should not be so relaxed about wasting the lives of their armed forces on foreign follies.

Turkey

A turkey is for life, not just Christmas.

Advice To Prime Ministers

Voters don't like ditherers.

World Class

Whenever I hear the phrase "world class", I instinctively reach for my sick bag.

Christmas

Christmas is for wants, not needs.

Ignorance

No matter how many "celebrities" would have you believe it, it is not clever to be ignorant.

Friends and Enemies

Be nice to your enemies, in case your friends turn out to be bastards.

Governments

Governments have experience of management, they only have experience of policy. That is why governments fail.

Meetings

Beware those who seek to hold important meetings at awkward times or awkward places.

Mediocrity

Mediocrity does not cut the mustard in a competitive environment.

Driving The Message Home

Sometimes the most effective method of driving a message home is via short sharp bullet points, driven home with a sledge hammer.

Partisan Politics

Partisan politics allows the voice of the individual to be heard.

Religion

Those who complain vociferously about jokes made against their religion may not in fact have the depth of faith, or confidence in their religion, that they profess to have.

Threats

The best and most effective of threats are those couched in the language of diplomacy.

Violence

Those who are forced to resort to violence in order to achieve an objective have already lost.

Advice To Former Prime Ministers

Repeatedly saying "I did the right thing" does not necessarily mean that you did.

Advice To Prime Ministers

Possessing and demonstrating a "volcanic temper", when thing go wrong, is not sufficient to prove that you are worthy to be Prime Minister.

The Darkness

People should never be afraid of embracing the darkness, the universe began dark and will end dark.