Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Our house guest has gone back to his own home now, staring at the chair in which he sat won't bring him back.

Advice To Brighton Council

Beware high profile building projects, into which you have "invested political capital", the timescale of which are "very much in the laps of the banks".

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

I am delighted that you enjoy playing with your toy moose that Eva brought you back from Sweden. However, when playing with it at 4am please could you not do so in our bedroom and on our bed.

Advice To Governments and Diplomats

Slamming a door in someone else's face may mean that you are unable to walk through it later.

Wrinkles

Just as a wrinkle in a suit tells more about the wearer than a suit that is perfectly pressed, so do people's character flaws.

Iterative Text

Complete and utter bollocks, I spurn it as I would spurn a rabid dog!

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

There really is nothing of interest to you up the chimney...honest!

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Please don't stare excessively at our guests when they are eating their breakfast, it disconcerts them.

Question For My Cat

Why did you not eat the piece of salmon I poached for you?

Question For The BBC

Why on earth does your "Southern Region" include Oxford and its environs?

Ongoing Advice To My Cat

Please wipe your mouth/nose occasionally during periods of protracted purring, in order to lessen the amount of dribble that you deposit on me.

Over Engineering

Over engineered processes are bound to fail.