Politics

Politics is a filthy business, it soils everyone who becomes involved with it.

Burning Candles At Both Ends

Absolutely bloody marvellous sometimes!

Text Messages

The invention of the devil.

Tinned Ham

Why does the contents of a tin of ham never look like the photo on the outside of the tin?

Playing With Fire

Sometimes the burn that you suffer from playing with fire is necessary in order to feel fully alive.

Belching News - Mugabe Takes Over EU

Mugabe takes over EU - See The Times

Advice To Labour Governments

Throwing money at a problem does not necessarily solve it, as the money is more often than not syphoned off by greedy consultants and foolish/inept administrators.

The End of Labour Governments

The end of Labour governments is always heralded by wave upon wave of strikes.

Advice To Amy Winehouse

Eat more food, take less drugs.

Advice To Retiring Presidents

Don't start another Middle East war in the dying days of your presidency.

Compromise

Leaders who claim to practice "leadership of compromise", don't understand leadership.

Memory

Memory is the last refuge of freedom.

Change

Change is a journey, not a destination.

Advice To Bradford and Bingley

Businesses that do not provide their directors with timely, accurate and reliable information fail.

Directors who don't recognise this are not fit to hold office.

Advice To Ex Presidential Candidates

"Suspending" your campaign, instead of "ending" it, smacks of denial and does your party no good in the forthcoming presidential election.

Lawyers

The legal profession has a reputation for complicating matters, with a view to justifying their existence and charging a higher fee.

It is not correct to tar all lawyers with the same brush, there are many who offer simple logical and reasonable solutions to seemingly intractable problems.

Advice To The Post Office

Your primary function in life is to deliver letters, not to provide excuses for non delivery of letters.

Advice To Weather Forecasters

Before presenting your forecast, look out of the window first.

Off Balance Sheet Loans

Not only do these mislead the shareholders, but they also mislead the directors of the company using them.